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Dark Shadows starring Johnny Depp: Depp might be the funniest vampire ever!

Posted on March 20, 2012 Written by ripitup

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Dark Shadows starring Johnny Depp, Michelle Pfeiffer, Eva Green & Helena Bonham Carter
Dark Shadows starring Johnny Depp, Michelle Pfeiffer, Eva Green & Helena Bonham Carter. Image via seat42f.com

I’m not a Tim Burton fan. As in I’ve so far enjoyed watching a total of 4 of his films: Batman, Batman Returns, Big Fish (my absolute favorite among them all) and Edward Scissorhands. Burton typically goes too cartoon-like- to the point where his humor and the relatability of the characters get lost on me.

Loving only half of Johnny Depp movies (the ones I don’t like are often directed by Tim Burton- the dude does wear pretty much anything Tim Burton gives him), I wasn’t all that excited about Dark Shadows…That was until I watched the hilarious trailer. If the movie is anything like it, it looks like I’m going to have one hell of a good time watching it .

Of course I don’t mind one bit that Michelle Pfeiffer is among the cast – I’ve liked a lot of her movies so far (Wolf, Tequila Sunrise, Hairspray, Stardust, Up Close & Personal to name a few.)

Dark Shadows Plot

A witch (Eva Green) curses the playboy Barnabas Collins (Johnny Depp) he is in love with, and turns him to a vampire, and then buries him alive. When he is accidentally woken up over 200 years later, it is the 70s and hilarity ensues he has to get used to all the new technology, the witch doing her best to seduce him, the state of the family business and the family members. Oh, and then there is the 70s fashion…

*

In case you are wondering whether our taste is similar or not when it comes to Depp, below are the Johnny Depp movies I like or love (in no specific order):

–          Finding Neverland

–          Once Upon a Time in Mexico (huge Desperado fan)

–          Blow (I almost cried at the end- never watched a movie that engaging about a drug dealer, and never felt such sympathy for one.)

–          Pirates of the Caribbean: Curse of the Black Pearl (hated 2 & 4)

–          In the nick of time

–          What’s Eating Gilbert Grape

–          Benny and Joon also starring Aidan Quinn and Julianne Moore.

–          Chocolat

–          The Rum Diary

–          The Man Who Cried

Recommended Johnny Depp Reading:

The Tourist starring Johnny Depp, Angelina Jolie & Paul Bettany

Johnny Depp A Kind of Illusion: The Book Review

Public Enemies starring Johnny Depp, Christian Bale and Marion Cotillard

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Filed Under: Movies and Actors Tagged With: dark shadows, dark shadows cast, dark shadows johnny depp, dark shadows movie, dark shadows trailer, dark shadows tv series, Eva Green, eva green dark shadows, helena bonham carter, Johnny Depp, johnny depp dark shadows, Johnny Depp movies, Michelle Pfeiffer, Tim Burton

2012 Golden Globes: Ricky Gervais? Tame? Never!

Posted on January 23, 2012 Written by ripitup

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  Ricky Gervais 2012 Golden Globes

Sorry, I’m a bit late about posting about Ricky Gervais’ third time hosting the Golden Globes. But I’ve been watching the Golden Globes for three years in a row- and all three because he was hosting it. And I’ve been writing about his jokes and the highlights and I didn’t want to make an exception. What can I say? I love Ricky.

I enjoyed this year’s show just as much as I did in 2010 and 2011 and my only complaint that the host should just get more time, especially if it is Ricky Gervais.

People love criticizing just to criticize and Ricky got his fair share of it. People said he went too far for two years. And then this year, apparently he wasn’t raunchy or outrageous enough. In Ricky’s defense, he was just as raunchy, but he had less time. And this year he didn’t have Charlie Sheen as material, or Paul McCartney. Or Cher.

But what really bothered me was that all the actors wanted to be funny when presenting, and if anyone brought the show momentum down, it was the actors- trying to hard to be “nice” and “casual” about Ricky. The only actors that didn’t annoy the hell out of me were Colin Firth, Meryl Streep and the William H. Macy-Felicity Huffman couple.

Below are some of my favorite Ricky moments and you can compare them with his  2010 and 2011 Golden Globe performances.

on Jodie Foster and her movie The Beaver   

The Beaver is a 2011 Jodie Foster drama, starring Mel Gibson and Jodie Foster. It’s about a man coming to grips with his depression with the help of a beaver-shaped puppet.

Ricky mentioned that not many guys have seen Jodie Foster’s Beaver. He is sure that it is good, just that it wasn’t seen by guys.  The joke is funny, no matter which meaning you want to get. Yes, Jodie Foster is a lesbian and movies like The Beaver don’t typically become box office hits.

on the network, award show and Mel Gibson

He introduced himself as Britain’s best comedian, presenting the second most-watched award show on America’s third most-watched network.

Then Ricky said that he was given a list of what not to joke about, and he read the “list of” from a paper. Apparently, he wasn’t to joke about Mel Gibson this year.  He wasn’t also allowed to talk too dirty, but he assured his audience that his vocabulary was quite rich. He wasn’t allowed to do anything naked (not that he ever did), and that it would be the audience’s loss.

on Johnny Depp

Johnny Depp was his first presenter, and he went a little easy on him. After all, he did mock the hell of The Tourist last year, saying that it was the only movie that didn’t have 3D characters and that the box office revenue came from the people who were bribed with Cher concert tickets. Not that it worked, as it wasn’t the 70s anymore.

This year he just asked Johnny if he has seen The Tourist and Johnny said no good-humoredly. But of course before Johnny came to the stage, part of Ricky’s introduction was “The man who wears anything Tim Burton makes him wear”. Since I get bored with 90% of Tim Burton’s movies and at least 60% of Johnny Depp movies, that line was more than enough for me.

on Colin Firth

There is nothing bad to say Colin Firth. Not about his personality, or about his movies. Sure, he made some bad movies in the past (Trauma, for instance), but having won the Golden Globe and the Oscar for Best Actor in 2011 for his role in The King’s Speech, and having been nominated for Golden Globe and Oscar for A Single Man the year before, it is not like he can joke about Firth’s movies, or performances.

And Colin has been a graceful guy, and it is not like he can joke about his personality. So Ricky did the next best thing. He mocked himself. He said Colin and he were both Brits, but unlike Ricky, Colin had an Oscar. “Oh, good for him”. And unlike Ricky, Colin has women swooning over him. Well, Ricky can’t see it but whatever. And he also said that Colin Firth was racist (which is OK because everyone knows he is not) and that he isn’t as nice as he appears as he punched a blind kitten (which again we know he didn’t.) So when Colin came, he greeted him with a handshake and mock-kicked Ricky.

on George Clooney:

It is a George Clooney year again, enjoying a kind of popularity that Mel Gibson and Kevin Costner (who both have two Oscars, in the same two categories: one for Best Film and one for Best Director) possessed in the 90s. And he is being praised by critics not only for his directing efforts, but his acting is loved too (Costner was nominated for Best Actor Oscar once, and Mel Gibson only has two Golden Globe nominations for his acting efforts).  But excluding his possible nominations this year, Clooney has already won an acting Oscar, and he has had several other nominations both for his acting and writing/directing. Yes, he is loved. And people do find him gorgeous. Why everybody is that fascinated by Clooney is beyond me.

And Ricky practically said George could give him a …….. (fill in the blanks) if George got any more successful or handsome. I think this was a great way to point out the Clooney craze, although I am not sure if Ricky thinks George is overrated.  But I did enjoy the joke all the same.

On Justin Bieber

Gervais just pointed out what a ridiculous idea it was to ask a paternity test from Justin Bieber, as the only way for him to get a girl pregnant was borrowing a Turkey roaster (or something to that effect) from Martha Stewart. “What a waste of a test that would have been”.

*

So no, I don’t think Ricky Gervais talking about his size, or joking about Jodie Foster’s beaver or Bieber’s impregnating abilities was tame. He is only tamer when you compare his Golden Globes material to his shows, where he would even joke about the hunger in Africa.

You don’t go to Gervais for political correctness. You go to him to be funny, unpredictable and outrageous. And the only mistake so far is that they haven’t asked him to do the Oscars yet. More time, more material. He would go crazy. I guess even the tamer Ricky isn’t tame enough for Hollywood…

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Filed Under: Movies and Actors Tagged With: 69th golden globes, Colin Firth, colin firth golden globes, George Clooney, george clooney golden globes, golden globes 2012, golden globes ricky gervais, Jodie Foster, jodie foster the beaver, Johnny Depp, johnny depp golden globes, Ricky Gervais, ricky gervais golden globes, ricky gervais golden globes 2012, the beaver movie

Golden Globes 2011- The Best of Host Ricky Gervais

Posted on January 23, 2011 Written by ripitup

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The 68th Golden Globes – Best of Ricky Gervais
Ricky Gervais at 2011's Golden Globes
Ricky Gervais at 2011's Golden Globes: He was outrageous, politically incorrect and downright hilarious! image via tvverdict.com

If there is one thing good about not being a Hollywood star, it is that Ricky Gervais won’t get to joke about you at the Golden Globes. The guy is hilarious, but let’s face it, he is not gentle and he is definitely not politically correct. And we love him for it. But I am not sure I’d want to be at the receiving end of his jokes.

Here’re my favorite Ricky Gervais lines from the 68th Golden Globes – the words may not be exact but the punch lines are intact:

on Charlie Sheen:

–          It’s gonna be a night of partying and heavy drinking, or as Charlie Sheen calls it: “breakfast”. Wow, so… Let’s get this straight. What he did was he picked up a “porn star”, paid it to have dinner with him, introduced her to his ex-wife: “how do you do?” went to a hotel, got drunk, got naked, trashed the place while she was locked in the cupboard… that was a Monday! What did he do on New Year’s Eve?

on “The Walking Dead” Hugh Hefner and his 24-year-old bride-to-be:

–           Talking of the “Walking Dead”, congratulations to Hugh Hefner, who’s getting married at the age of 84 to 24-year-old beauty Crystal Harris. When she was asked why she was marrying him she said: “‘Cause he lied about his age. He told me he was 94.

on Robert Downey Jr.:

–           I love this next presenter. He’s so cool. He’s the star of “Iron Man”, “Two Girls and a Guy”, “Wonder Boys”… Sorry, are these porn films? “Kiss Kiss Bang Bang”, “Bowfinger”, really? Here… “Up the Academy”. Come on… He was in all those films, but many of you in this room probably know him best from such facilities as the Betty Ford Clinic and Los Angeles County Jail. Please welcome Robert Downey Jr.

on Jim Carrey, Ewan McGregor and “Scientology”

–          Also not nominated “I love you Philip Morris”. Jim Carrey and Ewan McGregor: two heterosexual actors pretending to be gay, so the complete opposite of some famous scientologist thing. Um, probably. My lawyers helped me to get away with that joke; they’re not here.

on Tom Hanks and Tim Allen:

–          What can I say about our next two presenters? The first is an actor, producer, writer and director whose movies have grossed over three and a half billion dollars at the box office. He’s won two Academy Awards and three Golden Globes for his powerful and varied performances starring in such films as “Philadelphia”, “Forrest Gump”, “Cast Away”, “Apollo 13” and “Saving Private Ryan”. The other is… Tim Allen.

on The Tourist and the nominations of Angelina Jolie & Johnny Depp … AND Cher

–          It was a big year for 3D movies: “Toy Story”, “Despicable Me”, “Tron”. Seems like everything this year was three dimensional… except the characters in “The Tourist”. Uh, I feel bad about that joke. I… no… I’ll tell you what… I’m jumping on the bandwagon ’cause I haven’t even seen “The Tourist”. Who has? But, no… It must be good ’cause it’s nominated tonight. So shut up, ok? And I’d like to squash the ridiculous rumor going around that the only reason “The Tourist” was nominated was so that the Hollywood Foreign Press could hang out with Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie. That is rubbish, that is not the only reason, they also accepted bribes… No. All that happened was some of them were taken to see Cher in concert, how the hell is that a bribe? Really? “You wanna go to see Cher?” “No.” “Why not?” “‘Cause it’s not 1975.

on  Robert Pattinson and Olivia Wilde

–          The next presenters are very young, thin and beautiful. Which is just as well because they are presenting a category no one in America cares about: Best Foreign Language Film!

on Sex and The City 2

–          There were a lot of big films that didn’t get nominated this year, nothing for “Sex and the City 2”. I was sure the Golden Globe for special effects would go to the team that airbrushed that poster. Um, great job! Girls, we know how old you are: I saw one of you in an episode of “Bonanza”.

on Scarlett Johansson & Mel Gibson

Our first presenter is beautiful, talented and Jewish, apparently. Mel Gibson told me that. He’s obsessed. Please welcome Scarlett Johansson.

on Lost:

–          One of the biggest events on TV this year was the finale of “Lost”. One of my favorites. And all the questions were answered… yeah. I have to say, though, It was a complicated finale. I’m not sure I totally understood it all, but from what I can work out, I’m pretty sure the fat one ate them all.

–          **

  • Also one of my favorites, he presented Bruce Willis as Ashton Kutcher’s dad!

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Filed Under: Movies and Actors, TV shows Tagged With: Angelina Jolie, Ashton Kutcher, Bruce Willis, Charlie Sheen, Cher, Ewan McGregor, golden globe awards, golden globes, golden globes this year, hollywood foreign press, i love you philip morris, Jim Carrey, Johnny Depp, Mel Gibson, Ricky Gervais, ricky gervais golden globes, robert downey jr, Robert Pattinson, scarlett johansson, the tourist, the tourist movie, tim allen, tom hanks

Coming in May: Pirates of the Caribbean: On Stranger Tides starring Johnny Depp, Penelope Cruz, Geoffrey Rush & Ian McShane

Posted on December 23, 2010 Written by ripitup

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Pirates of the Caribbean 4- On Stranger Tides - starring Johnny Depp, Penelope Cruz, Ian McShane & Geoffrey Rush
Pirates of the Caribbean 4- On Stranger Tides - starring Johnny Depp, Penelope Cruz, Ian McShane & Geoffrey Rush. Image via filmofilia.com

Pirates of the Caribbean 4 starring Johnny Depp, Penelope Cruz, Geoffrey Rush & Ian McShane

And Captain Jack Sparrow is back!

The first movie of the Pirates of the Caribbean Series, The Curse of the Black Pearl came out in 2003, starring Johnny Depp, Keira Knightley, Orlando Bloom, Geoffrey Rush & Jack Davenport (Steve of Coupling). I find it to be one of Johnny Depp’s best movies. It was a perfect combo of adventure, romance & comedy – with great actors and impressive visual effects. It was huge hit with the audience and we had 2 more movies, pretty much with the same leads.

Unfortunately for me, the second part (Dead Man’s Chest) lacked the first one’s magic and the third (At World’s End) wasn’t a pleasant experience at all. Don’t get me wrong- I am not one of those people intrinsically against all sequels. I just didn’t enjoy these ones. When I heard a fourth was in the works, I couldn’t have cared less, that is until I saw the trailer.

The 4th film, On Stranger Tides is shot in 3D and looks really entertaining: there’s flesh blood, in the shape of Penelope Cruz and Ian McShane. Keira Knightley, Orlanda Bloom and Jack Davenport are not among the cast and this seems like a bonus. Sparrow has his usual quirky manners, unique sense of humor, a potential romance and more action and challenges than he can handle, including getting through zombies and surviving Blackbeard (Ian McShane) to get to the fountain of youth.

You can watch the trailer here, and decide for yourselves.

I just can’t wait until May.

Other Johnny Depp Movies & Posts

The Tourist starring Angelina Jolie & Johnny Depp

Top 8 Johnny Depp Films

Benny & Joon starring Johnny Depp, Aidan Quinn, Mary Stuart Masterson & Julianne Moore

Public Enemies starring Johnny Depp, Christian Bale & Marion Cotillard

Celebrities That Aged Really Well feat. Depp

Johnny Depp A Kind of Illusion – book on Depp

Handsome Actors to Play Villains: Johnny Depp, Keanu Reeves, James Spader, Antonio Banderas and Timothy Olyphant

Johnny Depp and Robert Downey Jr.: Hunky Actors of the 80s and 90s

10 Celebrities to Wear Flats for: Featuring Taylor Lautner, Johnny Depp, Kevin Bacon, Jon Bon Jovi and More

Other Posts on Penelope Cruz

Vicky, Cristina Barcelona starring Penelope Cruz, Javier Bardem & Scarlett Johansson

3 Happy Celebrity Couples: Javier Bardem, Penelope Cruz, Gwyneth Paltrow, Chris Martin, Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher

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Filed Under: Movies and Actors Tagged With: adventure, captain jack sparrow, comedy, curse of the black pearl, fantasy, Geoffrey Rush, ian mcshane, Jack Davenport, Johnny Depp, Johnny Depp movies, Keira Knightley, movies, on stranger tides, Penelope Cruz, Pirates of the Caribbean, Pirates of the Caribbean 4, pirates of the caribbean cast, Pirates of the Caribbean on stranger tides

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