Spread starring Ashton Kutcher, Anne Heche and Margarita Levieva

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Spread starring Ashton Kutcher, Anne Heche and Margarita Levieva
Spread starring Ashton Kutcher, Anne Heche and Margarita Levieva. 2009.

Nikki (Ashton Kutcher) is a handsome young man who came to Los Angeles to live the good life. And being aware of his looks, he has decided that the best way to do that is to seduce (older) wealthy women, gain their trust and well…live off them. His recent catch is Samantha (Anne Heche) an attractive woman who is a little older and has a fabulous house, complete with a swimming pool. Nikki soon starts staying at her place, driving her car and using her credit cards. And they have a lot of sex. Of course this  is not enough to stop Nikki from having sex with younger, sexy girls – at Samantha’s place. Samantha is pissed to find out, but their arrangement is far too comfortable for her to end it.

So Nikki keeps at his usual ways until he meets the young, pretty and fiery waitress Heather (Margarita Levieva). He does his best to bed her and when he finally manages, he realizes that she is just his female version. She has come to L.A. to live the good life and she is dating wealthy men to get it. Things however get a little complicated when Nikki has to start over and falls in love with Heather. There is no doubt that they are perfect for each other but who’s going to support them?

Spread, despite the comedy label on IMDB, is more like a drama with some entertaining moments and striking one-liners. Ashton Kutcher fits the part and the cast are fine. There is even Sebastian Stan in a supporting role as Nikki’s friend, who you might remember as Carter Brazen if you are watching Gossip Girl. And California is as gorgeous as always.

But is the movie worth watching? I don’t think so. Would I watch it if it didn’t take place in California? No. Would I watch it if Ashton Kutcher wasn’t in it? I really doubt it. And the fact is, I did use the fast forward button a couple of times, Ashton’s scenes included. There is not one likeable leading character, there are far too many sex scenes (more than necessary to prove the point) and well, who really cares about a womanizer who basically acts like a gigolo, falls in love with a female gold-digger and decides he wants to go straight? It is not funny enough to be a decent comedy and it doesn’t work as a drama. But I really don’t think it is director David Mackenzie’s fault. He shot pretty much exactly how any other director would have shot this story. Unfortunately, it is not really a story worth telling.

Now, this movie still can be recommended if you like your stories bittersweet, care about deeply flawed and superficial characters and are a hard-core Ashton Kutcher fan. It also helps if you want something of a soft porn. 6.0 on IMDB.

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Killers starring Ashton Kutcher, Katherine Heigl and Tom Selleck

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Killers starring Ashton Kutcher, Katherine Heigl, Tom Selleck and Catherine O'Hara
Killers starring Ashton Kutcher, Katherine Heigl, Tom Selleck and Catherine O'Hara. Directed by The Ugly Truth director Robert Luketic. 2010.

Jen Kornfeldt (Katherine Heigl) arrives in Nice, France to have a vacation with her parents (Tom Selleck and Catherine O’Hara).

Spy Spencer Aimes (Ashton Kutcher) is in Nice, staying at the same hotel and handling his deadly missions.

When the two meet, sparks fly and Spencer decides that he no longer wants to be spy. He wants a steady, normal life with Jen. So he quits. Of course Jen has no idea about Spencer’s background, she just thinks he is some sort of consultant. So Spencer quits and starts a whole new domestic life with Jen, and becomes accepted by her family.

Three years later, they are married and having the perfectly ordinary suburban life. Jen is working with internet security and Spencer is running his own firm. However, this comfortable existence is threatened when Spencer’s old boss tells him that he either finishes one last assignment or the “assignment” will finish him. Spencer is unwilling; however he is left with no choice when he realizes that his safe environment is not safe at all. He will have to confess his past, protect his wife and try save his marriage at the same time.

**

Killers is a romantic action/comedy. It is beautiful to look at and entertaining to watch, as long as you don’t try to get into the criticism mode too much. Even the smartest action movies are full of unintentional plot holes and being a romantic comedy first and an action comedy second, Killers does have quite a few. Another problem the movie has, it does fail to integrate all these three genres seamlessly. While Tom Cruise’s Knight and Day manages to be funny, romantic, exciting and sexy pretty much all the time, Killers starts as a fun romance, get a bit of a comedy, does romance again and by the time the action starts, the movie has already reached the middle. While it is not boring, knowing it is supposed to have action makes you a little impatient for the fast parts to start. And by the time the action is over, you think the movie should be in the middle, and not towards the end. So it does feel like two different movies at times.

So just treat Killers as the fluff, romantic comedy with action bits that it is, rather than an action comedy with romantic bits and you might have a good time. Katherine Heigl is OK, although I do think she is better at drama than comedy. Ashton Kutcher is s at home in a comedy as usual and Tom Selleck is priceless as always.

Fun note for Friends fans: Did the bit about the moustache remind you about Chandler and Richard? If it didn’t or if you haven’t seen that episode of Friends, it is in season 2, Episode 20. Watch that episode and have a hilarious déjà vu. Also the name of Jen’s ex is Richard, which is the name of the character Tom Selleck played in Friends.

Directed by Robert Luketic, the director of The Ugly Truth and 21.

Favorite Lines:

Jen: Are you going to kill me too?

Spencer: If I was going to kill you, I’d shoot you back in the house. That sounded weird.

**

Jen (on how many men Spencer killed): How many people, Spencer?

Spencer: Four.teen. (pointing to the one he just killed): 15.

Jen: Is 15 your real number? Or is it like when you ask a girl how many guys she slept with and  you have to double it times 10 (Spencer gives her a look). I didn’t do that.

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